When It Feels Too Good To Be True
My mother is the modern-day King David of Israel who defeated the giant, Goliath. As a Cameroonian girl living in extreme poverty, she often found herself in difficult situations. Like David, she was a child amongst many, meaning that she was forced to fend for herself on many occasions. She became accustomed to a survival mentality. One day, while I was preparing chicken for dinner, I remember her telling me tales of all the small animals, such as chicken or pigs, that she had to kill with her bare hands. After I highlighted the obvious parallel to David, I proceeded to ask her how she did it. I, for one, am very fearful of even the most docile and tame animals, so I couldn’t imagine the bravery it took to tackle undomesticated animals on the regular. “I had no choice,” she responded.
Eventually, as life progressed, the same God that delivered David, delivered her out of the hands of those circumstances. She and my father made sure my sisters and I never battled the same struggles they did; they strived to propel an alternate legacy. Despite all the blessings that our family experiences, I still see the lingering remnants of trauma. I see the trepidation that lingers when one experiences prosperity after privation. I see how my parents, similarly to people who lived through the American Great Depression, never feel too comfortable in their blessings. It’s as though the same God that delivered them is going to snatch back everything He ever did for them.
“Because we know that tough seasons are a given, we shouldn’t waste our joy and peace being fearful. Our memories of our trauma shouldn’t produce frantic and anxiety-filled preparation; it should not strangle our sanity and peace.”
What my mother said while we were cooking resonated with me because she illuminated the power that comes with a lack of choice. There is also a peculiar power that comes with not having another option. This is the kind of power that fuels you. It is the kind of power that forces you to not take the easy way out. When you don’t have another option, you have to do it anyway. You have to do it scared. It is guaranteed that there will be times in every single person’s life when they have no other option but to slay whatever chicken, pig, bear, lion, or even a full-blown Goliath, that is before them. Tough moments are inevitable, and in those moments you’re going to have to face it anyway. You have no choice, so you might as well do it depending on God.
I learned from King David to bask in God’s goodness. We are so quick to look at the dark seasons of our past with disdain. We easily indulge in the miseries of yesterday. Our memories should not lead us to become fearful that bad things are sneaking up around the corner. We already know that we live in a fallen world, and unfortunately, unfavorable periods are inescapable. Because we know that tough seasons are a given, we shouldn’t waste our joy and peace being fearful. Our memories of our trauma shouldn’t produce frantic and anxiety-filled preparation; it should not strangle our sanity and peace.
“…do not let the anxiety and past traumas strip you from accepting that you are capable and worthy of receiving good things.”
Rather, our memories should fixate on His deliverance. Do not focus on what you were delivered from, focus on who delivered you, and mediated on how you were delivered. When King David confronted the giant, he fixated his gaze on what God did in that season. He stated: “Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear…The LORD, who delivered me from the claws of the lion and the bear, will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.” He did not reminisce about how fearful he was in those moments. He also did not complain about how or why he even ended up in those situations in the first place. He directed his attention to how he was delivered.
In order to conquer the remnants of trauma, you have to immerse yourself in God’s glory. Your trauma does not need to haunt you, and it certainly should not impede on your present happiness. There is a time and a season for everything under the sun; there are times of highs, and times of lows (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8). But through it all, the key is to meditate on His goodness. You have to depend on Him. Realize that even if your worst nightmare actually did come true, at that moment, you would have absolutely no choice but to thug it out. You would have no other option but to push through—and guess what? God is going to be with you through it all.
I want to encourage anyone who is fearful of receiving His goodness: do not let the anxiety and past traumas strip you from accepting that you are capable and worthy of receiving good things. Good things can and will happen to you. It is okay to smile, it is okay to unclench your fist.
