It’s Raining In The Old City Now

Written By Fadwa Al Qasem

content disclaimer: death

It can happen in full sunlight,

on the calmest day:

preoccupation with death.

This unwanted waiting

for loved ones to die…

for yourself to die.

The waiting’s torture.

You know it’s coming.

You don’t want it to happen…

as if you have a choice.

It descends upon you,

a certainty so unbearable.

You almost yearn for it, to get it over with;

you spend your life preparing.

You’re never prepared.

And after a loved one is gone…

…the unbearable

is once again…

normal.

And normal

is once again…

heavier

than the unbearable.

And you know

you’ll never learn

how to go on living.

And worst of all,

you know that,

—in fact—

you will.

Fadwa Al Qasem

Fadwa Al Qasem (she/her) is a Palestinian-Canadian author and artist based in Spain and the recipient of the 2026 Jodi Stutz Award in Poetry from Toyon Literary Magazine. Having lived across four continents and moved 14 houses, home has always been the page. Her work explores identity, displacement, and the human condition through a lens of grief, resilience, and hope. She has published four short story collections and contributed to international anthologies across the U.S., UK, and the Arab world.

https://www.fadwa.com/
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